By Choice or By Nature

In our day to day life we come across many types of people. We mostly jell with people whose frequency matches with ours. Frequency matching is nothing else but we share something in common. Maybe the same home town, same college, same food habits, same thinking patterns etc etc.

But with people whom we initially interact but later realize that those are not “our type” people we start ignoring or sidelining them. Maybe coz somewhere we feel that their opinions contradict ours or we dislike some of their habits or maybe their attitudes towards other people.

This is very easy when it comes to relations with friends or any acquaintances but it becomes really difficult when it’s with relatives, cousins, neighbors or colleagues, or in laws. Coz these are the people whom you meet quite often. As a result we often hear people saying that we don’t like his/her nature, he’s short tempered, too egoistic, very professional, self centered so on and so forth. But lately what I have realized is there is one important thing which makes a person behave in a particular manner and that is its “upbringing”.

We often hear wife’s complaining about their husband being very untidy, not keeping things on their place and the list never ends. But you would say that this is the case with many of the male’s so does that mean everybody had same kind of upbringing. No! They did not have the same upbringing but for sure some things were in common. Maybe their mom’s never asked them to keep the place tidy or even if she did, it fell on deaf ears. so now when they grow up they expect the same from their wife’s.

In another case we often find a girl always speaking about themselves, praising themselves and worst criticizing others who they know are better than them. Firstly even I thought that this is how this individual is but when u meet her mom you actually know from where such vibes are coming from.

In case of a friend u can simply avoid such behavior or if not you can make another friend. But it can’t be the case with spouse or close relatives. We are told that one needs to accept them as they are. But when it comes to implementation it’s really not that easy. So rather than cribbing about how my husband /wife is or what kind of nature my in-laws have just try and understand that they can’t be really blamed for it coz many yrs have gone and they have been behaving in the same manner. So if we try to change it in a month or a yr it will not happen but yes u can surely try by making them realize that they are not like they portray and that they can surely improve. In this world where relations become sour and break as easily as glass I give u another reason of being hooked to your close ones. Just give a second thought when you blame somebody for something. Are they really at fault or it’s their upbringing who’s the culprit.
 
By : Swati Sharma